Friday, September 28, 2012

It's in His Kiss

Oh dear! Scrunchie! Scrunchie! Scrunchie! I shake my head.

As she walks past Desk#1 after the morning pleasantries she stops and immediately whines, "I'm exhausted too. I went on a date last night. He took me to dinner and he kissed me. I don't like the way he kisses. It's all," she wiggles her finger tips in front of her mouth and squinches up her face. "He wants to take me out again tonight...I just don't know!"

I tried to explain to her, "This was y'all's first kiss. Sometimes first kisses are bad. Maybe you've gotta teach him how you like to be kissed?"

I was not able to convince her, she poo-pooed my optimistic outlook.

Then as she is walking away and since she complains, whines, cries and moans about money and how with all of her bills she cannot afford to eat I holler out, "Hey Scrunchie! A girl's gotta eat," meaning, at least you are getting a free meal from a nice restaurant. "A girl has got to eat!"

Later in the morning she divulges more information about the good-night kiss. "He grabbed me up," mimicking her hands like a man rubbing up and down the back of an imaginary person who is standing in front of her. "He wouldn't let go, rubbing all on me."

"Well, he saw what he wanted and went after it."

"He was obviously hungry."

I giggle and begin to sing, "If ya wanna know if he loves you so it's in his kiss."

Her entire head turned bright red. We laughed.

She said, "Yeah, you're right. I could go out with him tonight and get a decent meal. Maybe I should just wait until next week to tell him I'm not interested in pursuing a relationship with him."

Later I call her back to Desk#2, "Hey! Come listen to this!"

I click play on YouTube. The Crystals sing "Then He Kissed Me." Scrunchie sang along with the song.

I quit goofing around and go back to work. Her cellphone rings the standard Sprint tone.

She looks at the phone's display, exasperated she huffs, "Hrmmmph! It's him!"

She sneaks off to have a private conversation. Upon her return she says, "He's so clingy! He called to tell me he is excited to see me tonight. I can't deal with this."

"Seriously! You are mad because he called to confirm plans with you and he is looking forward to spending time with you. He just said he can't wait to see you. He wants to see you. He's being nice!" I'm dumbfounded.

At this moment that man earns a soft spot in my heart. He reminds me of J-squared. Even though we've been dating for over a year J-squared still calls before dates to confirm and to express excitement in seeing me. Swoon! He has got home training.

I explain this to Scrunchie. I tell her that a nice guy with manners calls. He does not just show up unannounced and honk from the driveway for you to come outside to meet him. Somebody that is interested in you is polite and courteous.

Scrunchie mutters, "Well, I'm not used to being treated nicely."

I can't stop myself, "Maybe it's damn time you change that."

We take the conversation back by Desk#2, joking I tease her with a warning, "Scrunchie, you know after the third date you hafta put out."

We get a really good laugh out of this.

I explained those are definitely not my standards but extremely skeezy men will expect favors in exchange for supper. I suspect her date is not like that; yes mainly because he called to confirm. Secondly, he's a University English professor. If he wanted to be skeezy he would hit on the 18 year old girls, not date a 52 year old woman. Plus, I hold the English Department to a higher standard. I just do.

Scrunchie is now walking around the office humming the Shoop Shoop Song. For the first time in a long time her humming isn't annoying in the least.

Good luck on your second date tonight Scrunchie!

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