Thursday, February 2, 2023

Bad Days

November 13, 2019

Some days are good. I hadn’t cried in more than three days. Since July, that’s a record.

Some days are bad, today is one of these.

I had a nightmare that I am reliving all of this again, brand new. The doctor just told me that I have cancer.

I wake up crying this morning. Not little tears, but full on sobbing and gasping for air. My face, pillow, neck, and the hem of my pajamas are soaked.

Then, I don’t know what to do because as much as I want to forget this and get over it, I am sad over something I cannot control.

I am a huge proponent of mental health. As such, I am seeing a professional. I do not want to go. I cannot help to think, I am crying in my sleep, how can the professional control that?

#EndometrialCancer

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